What Grips You?

I absolutely love what I do. I love being able to sit and talk with people about what is going on in their lives. Many times the journeys that I hear stun me. So many people, including myself have been shaped by tragic events, monumental mistakes, deep hurts. If you have experienced something difficult or hurting in life you know the impact that it has on you as an individual and in your relationship with others. We put up walls, lack trust, become someone we aren’t so that we might please someone else, our lives change because of the things we have done or the things that have been done to us. We become gripped by the past. It is amazing how good we become at becoming someone else. It is so hard to deal with the things of yesterday. It is hard to deal with for a couple of reasons: 1. We can’t seem to forgive those who have wronged us. I say this very sensitively. I realize that the pain of being hurt cuts deeper then most will ever know. Whether it is divorce, disinterest, death, abuse, conditional love, or a multitude of other things, we have a hard time forgiving. Or maybe it’s just me? Forgiveness is hard to offer sometimes, because honestly, i think inside most of us, we want the score settled. We want that person or persons to know how bad we hurt. But you know, unforgiveness is so punishing. When i refuse to forgive someone who has wronged me, it is ME that ends up hurting worse. They don’t even realize I care enough to not forgive. One guy told me, “refusing to forgive someone is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die!” So true. My refusal to forgive destroys me before it every hurts the person that has hurt me. If i could encourage you today, FORGIVE! It doesn’t mean you condone what happened to you, it just means you have decided to stop carrying it around. Stop being gripped by it. I know it was terrible, i know someone should pay, but YOU need to be freed up. Forgive them and let Christ handle it from here. Move from the Victim to the Victor through forgiveness. Ephesians 4:32, “forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.” Even if they don’t deserve your forgiveness, forgive so that you can be freed up! Lay it down. 2. People remind us of our past. The second reason it is hard to deal with the things of yesterday is because often people will not let us move on. What i mean is, there is always someone who wants to remind us of who we Used to be or what you did at some other time. Now i understand there are consequences to actions. I get that. However, i believe whole heartedly that when Christ forgives you, you are forgiven indeed. I believe that when Christ saves you, you are changed from the inside out. You are a NEW creature. The Old or yesterday is gone, all things are new. I understand that we still may have to deal with the consequences of past decisions, but the fact is that man or woman is new. You may have to pay the price of the past, but you do not have to be trapped in the past! There are always those who want to remind us of our past, our failures, our mess ups, but Christ in You reminds you that it is no longer you who lives but Christ in you. Even when others refuse to let your past go, you must trust Christ has made all things new. Can you imagine how many times the Apostle Paul must have been challenged by what he had done before Christ forgave him? Just as his past didn’t keep him from having an eternal impact, neither should your past. Be strong and courageous. 

 

So what has you gripped? Do you need to forgive? Do you need to keep moving forward and let the past remain in the past? 

Headed in the wrong direction………

This morning i was challenged as I was rereading the story of the Prodigal Son. It is quiet possibly one of the most famous stories of the New Testament. Whether you are a believer or a non-believer you have probably at one time or another heard someone be referenced as a Prodigal son or daughter. The implication is that they did their own thing, left what they knew for something they considered better. Luke 15 tells the story of a man who has two sons, the younger of which wants to go his own way. Do it his own way on his own terms answering only to self. The young man ask for his share of the inheritance he would get from his father and heads off to “a distant country.” 

Now I must admit I have read and reread this story more then I could possibly recount. But something hit me this morning like it hasn’t before. This young man didn’t mean to destroy his life. He didn’t set out to leave home, squander his wealth, and enter into a state of depression over his circumstances. He didn’t intend to do this, but HE did do this. His plan back fired. He found in the distant country that he was a long long way from home. He wasn’t  bad guy with a bad intention. He was a normal guy who wanted to do things his own way. The problem was his way lead him in the wrong direction. His way cost him everything. His way severed relationships with those he loved and those who loved him the most. I wonder, when his bags were packed, his plan thought out, with his first step down the path to a distant country, if he thought it would cost him everything? I wonder if the road he was on looked scary or it looked promising? I wonder if he thought he would go to a “distant country” or if he thought he would go to the land of promise and the land of dreams? Simply put, this guy had a plan, had a path, but his plan and path were headed in the wrong direction. He lost it all! HIS plans were not all HE thought It would be. It cost him more then he had calculated.  - The good part is he went home and his dad received him back. This long hard story has a very happy ending. You or someone you know may be in the distant country now, but the road that led away can be traveled back. God will receive you back! I’m so thankful Christ never gives up on us.

question – Where are you? have you ever headed in the wrong direction? Did it cost you? Do you need to go back home? Do you know someone in the distant country now? Is it you?

IPod Users!

I love music. I can honestly say that I am a fan of all music. I can’t imagine living life without music. Music is the soundtrack for our everyday life. Music is so influential in all of our lives. We can hear a specific song and remember where we were, what we were doing, and who we were with. I also know that for many the issue of music is a very sensitive subject. Music lovers are loyal to their favorite artist and their preferred Genre of music. Country music fans love those great country music ballads, Classic Rock fans love those Southern rock tunes, Christian music fans love their praise and worship songs with a message, Hip Hop fans dig their music with a beat, it’s been said that Classical music sets a mood of learning and study, and Jazz music speaks to the soul of a man. I love my music and I have to have variety in my listening. I am addicted to itunes because I can buy individual songs to meet the demand of my listening at that particular moment. No one likes to spend 16 dollars for 10 songs when you really only like 2 songs on the album. I really can’t remember when the last time was that I downloaded a fully album. Itunes and my Ipod has changed the way I listen to music. Just this week I have listened to Country, Classic Rock, Praise and Worship, and even some movie Soundtracks. I LOVE MY ITUNES AND MY IPOD!

Question - What are you listening to? What is your favorite Song? What is your favorite band or singer? Why? What’s on your ipod? I look forward to hearing from you, don’t disappoint me. I am anxious to download some New Music, so hook me up with your favorites.

Where is the line?

I had a very interesting conversation today. One in which I would like to invite you to continue with me. Where is the line for speakers for a church event? Is it ok to have non-believers speak at Church events? When is the attempt to draw a crowd or reach a demographic going to far? We have all been to events simply because of the “BIG NAME” key note speaker. You weren’t necessarily interested in the event, but you wanted to see the speaker in person, so you went. Churches have often, invited professing Christians, and some who were non-professing Christians, with a nationally known name to speak at an event in the hopes of attracting the multitudes in an effort to share the Gospel. Most of us don’t think about it, we go or we don’t, but do you think the Gospel is blurred by a well intended effort? Or is it possible to leverage the fame of a random person (athlete, CEO, Rockstar, Actor, blogger, etc) to maximize the attempt to share the Fame of our savior?

What do you think? Where is the line? Does it matter?

Candy, Candy, Candy

I don’t know if you and your family acknowledge Halloween, but we have decided that Candy is a good motivation to get dressed up! In fact this year we dressed up like Spiderman, Batman, the Incredible Hulk, and a butterfly, and would you believe, we bagged some serious Candy. I must admit I encouraged the superheroes to pursue the always fulfilling “Milk Duds” yum! We visited the grandparents and once again we were not disappointed.

Question – What is your must have Candy?

Determine what you are Determined about!

5. Refuse to stop pursuing the Dreams God has given YOU!

What are you Passionate about? What is the dream of your life? What is the one thing that you long to achieve? If you could do anything what would it be? I find that a lot of people have let their dreams die. Someone said they couldn’t do it, they weren’t good enough, it would never happen, or they have even experienced failure in pursuing. I think some of the saddest individuals, are those who have watched their dreams die, and the spark of life is gone from their eye. They have chosen instead to live a life of the mundane instead of a life of adventure. I can’t help but think that when God says we are His “Workmanship” which literally means One of a kind, that He designs one of a kind dreams and adventures for our lives. In fact Ephesians 2 goes on to say that these “Workmanships” “were created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them.” Don’t you think that those good works are “one of a kind”, crazy, outrageous, incredible, works that He designed just for you. He could have created them for anybody but He thought of you and made you a “one of a kind” for a “one of a kind task”! Wow! That to me sounds incredible. It sounds fun. It sounds like life should be pretty amazing. That we, who are created in Christ, should live a life that we are determined to live out and to watch unfold, as God designs it! It seems to me that if you believed that you would be passionate about it. Passion, is the understanding, of what are you willing to suffer for. So when you determine what you are passionate about, you are determined what you are willing to suffer for, and you have determined what you are determined about. You have found the dream God has planted in your heart, the God centered dream that He has created you for, and you live your life pursuing it, knowing that the living out of that dream brings maximum Joy to Christ and ultimate satisfaction to our life. We become men and women who will not stop, not give up, not walk away, not lose heart, we must live the life God created us to live exercising the gifts He has given us, so that this short life brings Glory to Him! When we live that way, we find our ultimate Joy in Christ, and He uses us and our lives for His ultimate Glory! Refuse to give up on the dreams God has given you! Be faithful in the gifts and talents that He gave you. Be passionate, be courageous, be faithful.

Pain is part of Loving Others

3. Often it is the people you are closest to that hurts you the deepest.

When you read this point, you may be just a little confused. I know when I was being mentored this understanding really puzzled me. I am first a relational person. I am a people pleaser, but more then that I desire to help others. Often I lead with my heart and fail to understand that I could be hurt by the person I trusting and helping. Making yourself vulnerable to be close to someone is always a scary thing. It is a lot easier to just keep people at a distance, but when you decide to really invest and love someone, get involved in their life, and let them see you for who you are, you must realize that you might get hurt. I don’t know why it happens, but it does. However, I have found the most fulfilling relationships I have ever had has been with the people I made myself most vulnerable with. I think you will find that it is worth the risk of being hurt, because you just might find you really impacted someone for their life for the better and you might have made a friend that knows you like no other. It is a lot easier to hide behind walls and refrain from being vulnerable, but you need someone just as much as they need you.

Celebrate the Small Victories!

The Second thing my mentor taught me is:

2. Celebrate the small victories!

How often have we been guilty of looking past today to see tomorrow, to find that when we arrive in tomorrow we are ready for the next thing? It happens, we are constantly striving for more, for something better, for something new, and in the process we find ourselves guilty of missing out on the small victories. If you are as driven as I am, nothing ever seems to meet the standard that we have set for ourself. There was always something else that could have been done. The problem with this understanding, and let me assure you that there is nothing wrong with being a determined person, however, determined people who fail to see and celebrate victories will become frustrate people. Without celebrating the small victories, we can never really appreciate the big victories! Not always, but many times, the big victories are the product of many small wins along the way. So the next time you see that small victory come, stop and celebrate it, even if it is for just a moment. It will be in that moment that you can realize the significance of the journey and put into perspective all that you have been working for! The big victories will come, but the small victories will set the stage for you to appreciate the monumental moments.

5 Things I Learned From Being Mentored!

I know many people who are spending time mentoring and disciplining some one they believe have potential or even some one that may be facing some pretty difficult times. I have had the privilege to mentor and disciple and have had the great benefit of being mentored. Often times, you wonder, what am I suppose to teach this person? I am barely making it myself, so what do I share with this young man or young woman? I want to share with you some things that i have found to be beneficial to me in the mentoring process. What I am going to share with you are 5 things my mentor has taught me that I try to share with those who I am disciplining and mentoring. I will post 1 – 5 through out the next few days.

1. You are more than just a title or job description.

How easy is it to begin to believe that you are what your title says you are? I’m a boss, a preacher, a salesman, banker, Pharmacist, whatever the title may be, often times, it becomes the very thing that shapes us and makes us who we are. Now I know we do these things, we are salesmen, bosses, bankers, but that is only part of what we do, we are not those things, and when we believe that the title is what gives us significance then we are walking a very dangerous path. The reason this is so important and such a dangerous understanding, is that titles are temporary. Titles change. Titles are lost. If we are what our title says we are, then our title becomes our substance, when the title changes, for whatever reason, then our substance is gone! I’ve personally seen men and women lose their way in life after losing their title. They couldn’t see who they really were, they were a person long before they were a title. They were a creation long before they were an employee. They were created purposefully by God Himself, long before they became a person identified by their name tag. When you realize that our title is something that we do and not necessarily who we are, then we are free to live within the understanding of that title and not bound by the identification of that title. When your title is something you do and not who you are, then your title can be taken away or lost or left or change and the person within the title is still living and flourishing as a creation of the one and only living God. It can be very painful when our title changes, but it doesn’t have to destroy us, we must remember after all the titles, we are still a “Workmanship” of Jesus Christ. “For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus For good work, which God prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them.” Ephesians 2:10

An invitation for the Journey!

 

Try living a life responsible for these men!

My name is J. Phillip Martin. Among many other things, I am a pastor, husband, and the father of triplet boys and one amazing daughter. 

I am beginning this blog because somewhere in the deepest part of me, I believe I can’t be the only one who struggles with Life. This is my attempt to capture my thoughts, provoke yours, and see if we can encourage and support one another along this thing we call life. I must admit, most of my thoughts aren’t that interesting, but it is possible that you and I have more in common then we may even know. I want to invite you to join me as we journey together. What you will read are just my thoughts, some will be dumb, some pretty interesting, many from my convictions, and a few off the cuff, never the less, what you are about to join me on is just my thoughts concerning this journey! Thank you for joining me and I look forward to engaging this world and this life with you!

Phillip